Search Results for ‘Perfectly Normal, Natural Things’
Templeton
[caption id="attachment_12725" align="alignright" width="150"] Templeton[/caption] Nothing ruins an erotically good time quite like the realization that you’re lacking protection – namely, condoms. We see it all the time in commercials and movies: a couple is in the middle of foreplay, primed and ready to go, and then, someone asks, “Do you have a condom?” They can run to a store and buy a box, have sex anyway sans latex, or they can simply call it night. But let’s be honest; in the heat of the moment, it’s a struggle to put the action on hold so you can hurry to a convenience store and purchase some rubbers. And with hormones coursing through your body, I doubt many would simply take sex out of the equation. Unfortunately, people often say “screw it” and do the deed anyway, which is one of most irresponsible decisions you can make regarding your sexual health. As college students, we need to accept the fact that we exist within a hook-up culture. Sure, there are students who believe in and practice monogamy because, let’s face it, we live in the Bible Belt, and being monogamous is the “norm,” what society at large expects of us. That being said, just because you’re in a monogamous relationship doesn’t mean your sexual exploits are any “safer” than your non-monogamous counterparts, especially if you haven’t been tested for STIs and such. While other students remain celibate, either by choice or circumstance, the reality is that for many of us, college is a time of exploration and experimentation. Sometimes, we decide to break with tradition and sleep around or have multiple sexual relationships at once, and there’s no shame in that – as long as you’re being smart about it. By smart, I mean taking the steps necessary to protect yourself and your partner(s) from unwanted pregnancy and STIs. So why the hell are we still asking our bedmates if they have a condom? Shouldn’t we expect each other to be equipped with the basic necessities at all times? Even if you’re on the fence about hooking up, common sense dictates you be prepared because you never know whose bed you might find yourself in at 1 a.m. If you do decide a one-night-stand is for you, it’s a choice I hope you’ve considered in depth. Making the decision to hook up, regardless with whom, is not something you want to decide in the heat of the moment. You should be aware of and comfortable with your own boundaries. But say you’ve never thought about it before and find yourself in a situation you hadn’t even considered a possibility because it does happen. People surprise themselves all the time. You tell yourself you want a meaningful relationship before you engage in intercourse, but then you meet a knock-out at a party and wind up going home together. What happens when neither of you has a condom? Luckily, we live in a town where Wal-Mart is open 24 hours a day, but like I said earlier, good luck putting your libido on hold. If you’re low on cash, the Student Health Center provides male latex condoms, primarily Trojans and the ONE brand. Often, there is a fishbowl in the waiting room so students can help themselves to a few while they’re there, and they are also available in each of the exam rooms. If you want more than “just a couple,” you can get 20 condoms for $2 plus tax. Mary McDaniel, assistant director of Health Services, said they also special order flavored or scented varieties, non-latex male condoms and female condoms for event giveaways. And then there’s the age-old question of just who exactly is responsible for providing protection. As far as heterosexual relationships go, there’s a cultural belief that men should be the sole provider of the condom. But ladies, you simply cannot depend on your male partners to provide the rubber because there’s always the possibility that he doesn’t have one…or two, or however many you’re going to need if, say, you’re shooting for multiple rounds. You’ve got a few options. You can either buy a package of male condoms yourself, or you can opt for a female condom. In any case, you’ve got to be able to protect yourself. Female condoms come in one size only and are a good option for some, especially those who don’t always know what size of male condom they might need. As for my non-heterosexual friends, the same basic concept applies to people of all sexual identities, regardless of what hardware you have between your legs. If you’re in for some male to male action, you both need to have a condom that will fit your own penis, even if you’re not planning on doing any penetration. I’ve already covered the importance of making sure your junk is clean before you perform oral sex (Perfectly Normal, Natural Things" href="http://www.esubulletin.com/2012/09/13/12421">The Pregame Sniff), but no amount of soap and water will ward off a sexual infection. If you both have vaginas, you still need a condom if you’re planning on implementing toys, produce, etc., or even if you’re just using your hands. If you’ve got a wound on your finger, it can get infected. And as for oral sex, use whatever you prefer, be it a dental dam or a piece of saran wrap. The bottom line is, you are responsible for girding your own loins, no one else.
 
Michelle Wilk
[caption id="attachment_12142" align="alignright" width="150" caption="Michelle Wilk"][/caption] I have recommendations concerning Kenzie Templeton's sex column "Perfectly Normal, Natural Things." I feel that she needs to refrain from passing judgment upon any form of sexual act. Her use of "skanky" in her most recent article was especially rude and slut-shaming. She may have just alienated some, if not a majority, of her readers. In addition, her vocabulary is unprofessional, such as "bumping uglies," "wee bit of fabric," and "boinking." If she is to write a sex column and be taken seriously, she should employ the appropriate language, instead of skirting around the topic by using poorly thought-out euphemisms. However, not only is her language inappropriate, the content is also perpetuating rape culture. The heteronormative undertones are barely excusable, but her encouragement of "a friendly ass grab" is definitely not excusable. It condones sexual harassment. She should also research before writing an article. For example, she claims if "you can't wait until you're back at your apartment or dorm...you're more than likely about to experience some of the most erotic sex of your life." While it is understood in the article that the ensuing sex is consensual, this may not always be the case. The sex could be coercive or completely non-consensual. In addition, research has actually been done to counter her point, as measured by orgasm (for the reference, just ask). Therefore, the assumption that erotic sex is equivalent to impulsive sex is rather unfounded. Her journalistic, professional integrity is undermined by this article, especially when she states, "Like any good photojournalist, I tried to snap a picture, but I was too unskilled and it was too dark. Plus I felt like a total pervert." With the advent of cell phone cameras, "civilian journalism," and the internet especially, ethics has seemed to become secondary to the urge of capturing a moment. However, with her training as a photojournalist, she should be educated in the appropriate ethical ramifications of taking a photograph, such as the requirement of consent of those photographed. Because of her education, she should understand the implications of taking a photograph of such a sensitive situation. Her addition of, "Plus I felt like a total pervert," does not excuse the possible unethical nature of her intentions. This is commentary that should be kept private, not divulged in an article. My recommendations regarding "Perfectly+Normal%2C+Natural+Things&x=25&y=7">Perfectly Normal, Natural Things" are for her to alter the intention of the column to be more sex positive with an educational objective. For example, she could have a column regarding communication with friends about how to handle sexual situations so instances of "friends having sex while (she) was in the room, car, hot tub, etc" do not happen. She should present a more professional attitude while writing this column if she wishes it to be taken as a serious piece of journalism (e.g. not using phrases such as "crotchal region"). Third, she should reduce her heteronormative undertones and take into consideration that her audience is extremely diverse. My final recommendation is that she diminish, if not completely eliminate, anecdotes from her column instead of providing them as evidence or justification for her articles. *Column is also endorsed by Bethany Bailey, Katie Penny, and Czarli Rex