Last week I received an email of epic importance. The Clinton Global Initiative has officially invited ESU to attend their yearly conference in Florida in April. To understand why this is so exciting, let me explain what CGI is. The Clinton Global Initiative is a mufti-issue foundation created by former President Bill Clinton to combat some of the world’s biggest problems.

            The group meets once a year to discuss solutions and policies that could be enacted to fight some of the global concerns. These issues range from energy and climate change to global health, from  human rights and peace to poverty alleviation. The group is a gathering of city leaders, non-profit organizations, students and community members from around the country who are interested in working together to face these problems.

            Clinton Global Initiative University is the same basic principle but to the scope of colleges around the country. The goal of CGI U is to address the biggest issues facing the modern university, mainly environmental sustainability and support for the local community.

            So what does this have to do with ESU?

            The ESU administration approached Environmental Club last winter and requested we submit a project for CGI U.

            That’s where our project comes in. Working with multiple departments on campus including TCS and the physical plant, we have put together a project that could save the school thousands of dollars in energy conservation.

            Our project contains two main components: a comprehensive campus wide audit of energy used by the computers and computer accessories, and the implementation of smart strips in all computer labs to reduce the energy use of the computers.

            The first part seems almost too basic to include in a project like this, but we were surprised to find out the school did not already possess this information. We are gathering data as to how much energy is used by the computers on campus. This includes when they are being used, when in standby mode, and when turned off. Computers, like a lot of electronics, still use energy when plugged in, even when turned off. This energy audit also includes related electronics such as the monitor, speakers, and printers. 

            Currently energy information, as well as the cost associated with it, is gathered on a campus-wide level as there is no way to properly gauge what each building is using individually. Our audit will break the information down by buildings to better understand where the most energy is being used.

            This information will be monumentally helpful to the campus, as it can be used as a base for all other projects in the future. In order to implement new ideas such as the smart strips, we must first have an idea of how much energy is being used, so we can properly estimate how much will be saved.

            Once we have an idea of the state of energy consumption on campus we can discuss plans to reduce use.  One of the best ideas presented so far is the use of smart strip technology. These strips, which look like regular surge protectors, would shut down everything that is plugged in once the “main” item was shut down, in this case the computer itself. So if the computer is shut down, the monitor, printer, and speakers would shut down as well. We feel this would drastically reduce the amount of energy that is lost to idle time or when the computer is left on over weekends and after hours.

            In the next issue of The Bulletin, I will discuss the other half of our CGI project – the educational aspects.

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You know Hollywood is running out of good ideas when a remake of the ‘80s Cold War action flick “Red Dawn” sounds in any way appealing to a modern audience. Hollywood is also making a few bucks off of a Wolverine of a different sort with the new trend of making superhero oriented movies of varying quality and fan following. Many casual movie goers may view comic books themselves as a strange and childish medium read by virgin lads with altars to Kevin Smith in their bedrooms. To combat this, some literary critics have insisted that comic book superheroes are to us what Beowulf was to his audience – a reflection of what we view as heroic in our own time. I would have to agree with these literary critics, and present to you Josh’s Top 5 “Superheroes.”

5. Green Lantern a.k.a. Hal Jordan– The Green Lantern is a DC Comics hero with power that derives from a ring that can create solid matter and energy only limited by the bearer’s imagination, courage and willpower. In essence, the ring of Green Lantern is as strong as he wills it to be. Whenever the Green Lantern desires to “recharge” his ring he places it in a lantern and recites the Green Lantern Oath: “In brightest day, in blackest night,/No evil shall escape my sight/Let those who worship evil’s might,/Beware my power… Green Lantern’s light!” Green Lantern is scheduled to be made into a movie with Ryan Reynolds playing the jeweled harbinger of justice.

4. Thor a.k.a. Donald Blake – Thor is the Norse god of thunder, and one of the most powerful beings in existence in the Marvel Comics universe. This Viking badass is sent to earth under the guise of a meek scientist that transformed into the god of thunder whenever he tapped his cane on the ground. The fact that a Norse god finds himself fighting crime on Earth is astounding, especially when you consider the injuries you could incur if you decided to shoplift then get your ass beaten by a giant hammer wielding guy with a winged hat and cape. Thor’s hammer, Mjolnir, has the ability to beat the hell out of frost giants, other gods and even give the Incredible Hulk a run for his money. On top of all of this, Thor is getting a movie adaptation directed by acclaimed Shakespearean actor Kenneth Branagh – NERDGASM!

3. The Comedian a.k.a. Edward Blake – I get a peculiar sense of joy in including The Comedian in this list. The Comedian was a character in Alan Moore’s 1986 “Watchmen” graphic novel that did everything a hero is not supposed to do while still being considered a masked hero. He takes the idea of humans being anything more than animalistic as a sick joke and does whatever he damn well pleases in order to prove that correct. He does all this while chomping on a cigar and wearing a happy face pin on his costume. The Comedian is one of the characters that marked the turning point of comic book characters from masked defenders of the Status Quo to literary characters that can spit in the face of all that we hold dear.

2. Batman a.k.a. Bruce Wayne – Batman was created by comic book artist Bob Kane in 1939. Batman’s origins lie in the tragic tale of multi-millionaire Bruce Wayne whose parents were murdered in front of him as a boy. As he matured, Wayne took it upon himself to fight crime with fighting techniques and gadgets that he could acquire with his virtually unlimited personal resources. Featuring some of the coolest villains in comic book history such as The Joker, Two-Face and the Riddler, Batman’s status as a human and powerless superhero has translated to instant box-office success. Batman’s appeal lies in his ability to tow the line between hero and villain with his personal creed to never kill. Often the only thing that separates his personal trauma from his enemies is his oath to not kill and this created some of the heaviest stories in modern comic history.

1. Captain America a.k.a. Steve Rogers – This patriotic pansy turned super-soldier exploded onto the comic book scene with a right hook straight to Hitler’s face for his first cover in 1941. Captain America began as a wartime propaganda character that was later revived into a leader for the legendary superhero team The Avengers. Cap’s power derives from a serum that was administered to him as part of a World War II experiment to create the perfect soldier. The Cap may remind some of the jingoistic ignorance of the mid 20th century but his post revival self has come to represent the unyielding ideas of liberty, patriotism and moral uprightness. He has even, on several occasions, rebelled against the demands of the U.S. political system to better protect his belief in the freedom of the citizens he shields.

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I’ll be the first to admit that women carry a certain burden that men can never quite understand. In the traditional social roles that have been maintained by a patriarchal system the domain of women has been the home and family, while we boys get to go outside and play cowboys and Indians. Well, in honor of Women’s History Month, I am going to recognize what women I think best went out to play with the boys, and often kicked their asses. Here is Josh’s Top 5 “Badass Beauties.”

5. Annie Oakley – Annie Oakley was a famous sharpshooter of the Wild West, and considered by many to be first true American female superstar. Born Phoebe Anne Mosey, she initially began shooting to support her widowed mother and seven brothers and sisters, but became widely noticed when she beat her future husband (also a sharpshooter) in a shooting contest. Standing at five feet tall, the little lady stunned audiences of Buffalo Bill’s Wild West Show with her shooting expositions. Oakley was rumored to be able to shoot a playing card facing the edge, and then shoot it six more times before it hit the ground. Clint Eastwood: eat your heart out.

4. Boudicca – This queen of the ancient Britons, whose name means “victory” in her native tongue, came to prominence when her husband died around 60 A.D. Her husband was a King of the Iceni tribe that was allied with the Romans, and according to his wishes he wanted his daughters to rule his tribe after his death. After his death, the Romans flogged Boudicca, raped his daughters and seized his tribes holdings. Boudicca roused several of the tribes of Briton together to rebel against the occupying Romans, and in her campaign of retribution it is estimated that she killed between 70,000-80,000 people in the three major settlements she attacked. Her attacks prompted the emperor Nero to consider abandoning Britain altogether, and forced him to reroute whole legions from other places to put down this female rebel filled with righteous indignation.

3. Anne Bonny – Anne Bonny is remembered simply for the fact that she was a female pirate during the “golden age of piracy” in the 18^th century. Bonny married a small time pirate, and then promptly cheated on him with another pirate named “Calico Jack” Rackham. Rackham offered Bonny’s husband money to buy her for marriage, but she refused to “be bought and sold like cattle.” Bonny joined Rackham’s crew and with another female pirate, Mary Read, they stole a ship called the “Revenge.” The infamous three sailed around the Caribbean taking ships and money. Bonny was eventually captured but used the fact that she was pregnant with Rackham’s child to delay her execution until her father could pay her ransom.

2. Lyudmila Pavlichenko – During World War II the Soviets became renowned for their use of snipers, particularly the skill of Vasily Zaytsev who was portrayed by the significantly less fugly Jude Law in the 2001 film, “Enemy at the Gates.” He had 242 verified kills, and got enough bling from Comrade Stalin to make Lil’ Wayne jealous. Uniquely, the Soviet Army also allowed females to serve as snipers, where Pavlichenko became famous for her 309 confirmed kills. This woman from Ukraine, who was also a successful student at the University of Kiev, was one of 2000 women to volunteer to be snipers for the Red Army. Only 500 of them survived the war, with Pavlichenko being one of them. Pavlichenko received the Order of Lenin and Hero of the Soviet Union, which is less recognition than what Zaytsev received for killing fewer men. She went on to be the first Soviet citizen to visit the White House, had her own stamp made in the Soviet Union in 1943 and 1976, had a Woody Guthrie song written about her and finally had a ship named after her posthumously. She is considered by military historians to be the most successful female sniper in history.

1. Joan of Arc – If you ever wonder what God tells people to do, look up Joan of Arc. This 15^th century maiden of France rose to prominence when she claimed that God had told her to drive the occupying English back to their homeland. Joan did not simply stand back and watch what her visions could inspire, but instead strapped on armor and rode out to the city of Orleans where she helped break the long standing siege in only nine days. She took bold action in leading French forces when their strategy up to that point had been one of caution and cowardice. Joan was captured when she was unhorsed by an archer, and she was kept in prison due to her family’s inability to pay her ransom. She died being burnt at the stake by English clergymen for heresy after being sexually assaulted and signing a confession she couldn’t read. Joan was canonized years later when Pope Callixtus III declared her innocent of any charges of heresy.

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We’ve all been told that protecting the environment is of the utmost importance, but do we ever stop and question why that is? What is it exactly about nature that we are trying to preserve? Is it the same for everyone? Does it matter why we are motivated, as long as we are helping in the end?

These are questions addressed by the field of environmental ethics.

This branch of philosophy focuses on the ideals and viewpoints found within the realm of the environmental movement. Environmental philosophers examine what shapes society’s opinions on nature, and what the consequences of those viewpoints are.

Here at ESU you can take Environmental Ethics with Professor Charles Brown in the Social Sciences department. I was able to take the class last year and it drastically altered the way I view environmentalism.

With any action, it’s pivotal that we understand our self-interest in the issue. Why do we care about this issue, in this case the environment? What does it mean to us?

Enviro-ethics tries to answer that question by presenting a variety of reason and logic based arguments designed to prove that nature should be revered and protected for its own right, not just because of what it has to offer us as humans.

Enviro-ethics would say that nature is good, not because of its use usefulness to humans, but due to its own inherent qualities. Nature, by the way, is defined as all that is subject to a life, to put in ethics terms. That would include all animals, plants, and ecosystems that exist throughout the planet.

And all things should be equal under the eyes of the planet. A snail, though it gives humans little benefit, is just as valuable as fossil fuels.

Environmental philosophers draw parallels between man’s domination over nature to man’s domination over the female gender, and over ethnic minorities.

The same kind of mindsets that once kept women and minorities from attaining their fully deserved rights are still present in the way we view nature. In the same way we expanded our scope on women and minorities, so should we expand our scope of nature.

This might all sound like a lot of over analysis to some of you. I feel it is important to examine our motivations to a micro level, to better understand why we do what we do.

That being said, there is something to be said about the ends justifying the means. If someone was recycling, but didn’t agree to the tenets of environmental ethics, I wouldn’t stop them from turning in their cans and bottles.

Right now the environmental movement needs all the support it can get, regardless of the reason behind it.

If this is something you’d like to learn more about I highly recommend taking Environmental Ethics with Brown. Also, Environmental Club and Philosophy Club are teaming up for a joint discussion on the morality of environmentalism at 7 p.m. next Tuesday at Javacat.

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Warfare is perhaps the single thread that has permeated all of human history. Whether you view war as the unfortunate bloodshed that is necessary to change the world, or as the ultimate demonstration of man’s greed and stupidity, it has some great rhetoric associated with it. Hollywood portrays most epic battle sequences with a speech directly before the action, and sometimes it makes us feel like we’re part of the always under-equipped and outnumbered army. So here is Josh’s Top 5 spine-tingling, ass-kicking inducing movie pre-battle speeches.

5. Aragorn’s speech at the Black Gate from “Lord of the Rings: Return of the King” – Up until this point in “Lord of the Rings,” we’ve sat through a movie so lengthy that even the talking trees merited a hooray for some excitement. Following the massively scaled and miracle laden battle of Minas Tirith, we are treated to the even more desperate battle at the Black Gate of Mordor. When this speech is delivered to the men of Rohan and Gondor that face certain death at the hands of the forces of Sauron, you’ll want to go hunt some Orc yourself. That being said, you still can’t excuse the Fellowship’s bed scene at the end of the movie. Favorite line: “A day may come when the courage of men fails, when we forsake our friends and break all bonds of fellowship – but it is not this day!”

4. Plataea speech from “300” – This speech was delivered at the end of “300” by the ridiculously ripped and one eyed character Dilios who is played by David Wenham. The audience has just seen the death of Leonidas and his 300 Spartans play out, and they took a few thousand Persians with them. Their sacrifice at Thermopylae has inspired the armies of Greece to get together and unload both barrels on the Persians. During the speech, the Persians with 3:1 odds in their favor, are off-screen apparently crapping their pants at the prospect of fighting 10,000 Spartans and 30,000 other Greeks – bona-fide badass. Favorite line: “This day we rescue a world from mysticism and tyranny and usher in a future brighter than anything we can imagine.”

3. Speech at Area 51 from “Independence Day” – This speech is sure to make anybody want to piss red, white and blue. The city sized spaceships of an alien race have decimated the cities of the entire Earth, and their ships have a shield that protects them from any weapon humanity has. A character played by Jeff Goldblum discovers a computer virus that can disable the aliens’ shields and a worldwide counterstrike against the invaders is coordinated, with the good ol’USA leading the charge with Bill Pullman and an alcoholic crop duster as the heroes. God Bless America. Favorite line: “And should we win the day, the 4th of July will no longer be known as an American holiday, but as the day when the world declared in one voice: ‘We will not go quietly into the night! We will not vanish without a fight! We’re going to live on! We’re going to survive!’ Today, we celebrate our Independence Day!”

2. Speech before the Battle of Stirling from “Braveheart” – In any other set of circumstances the occurrence of a bunch of men in skirts with blue faces might be seen as a tad peculiar. In “Braveheart,” it’s about the manliest damn thing you can imagine. William Wallace is motivating his Scottish rebels to hold their ground and fight alongside him against the mass of English knights across the field. This speech gives me chills every time, simply for the fact that he acknowledges that his men have the choice to go home and die a peaceful death in their beds sometime in the future, but that staying there and kicking the shit out of the English gives testament to their Y-Chromosomes. Favorite line: “And dying in your beds many years from now, would you be willing to trade all the days from this day to that for one chance, just one chance to come back here and tell our enemies that they may take our lives, but they’ll never take our freedom!!!”

1. St. Crispin’s Day speech from “Henry V” – This was the original speech that inspired every “let’s take a few of the bastards with us” type speeches that we know today. Originally written by William Shakespeare in 1599 for the stage, this speech comes from the title character right before the Battle of Agincourt. For the best version of this on film, I recommend Kenneth Branagh’s 1989 version. The historical battle’s details may be different, but in the play, Henry’s English forces are outnumbered by the French 5:1. Henry has to motivate his men to go out onto the muddy field of Agincourt and face the knights of France. Henry’s men are tired, few and the visiting team. I won’t spoil the ending. Favorite line: “We band of brothers; for he to-day that sheds his blood with me shall be my brother.”

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Harrison George

Like many of you, I was shocked and disappointed by the recent outburst of cold weather we have been experiencing. I was hoping that the coldest chapter of winter was behind us, but this last week has proven that is not so.

Winter is always a difficult time to be eco-friendly, as staying comfortable typically means running the heater in your home and in your car. We all tend to spend less time outside and use our cars more often.

Though I tell myself every winter this will be the year I break my dependency on my car to get around in the cold, it has yet to actually happen. Emporia is the perfect sized town to walk or bike; you are never more than 20 minutes away from where you are going.

But the bitter windy Kansas cold makes it very difficult to stick to my convictions when it’s time to run errands or get to campus. Add to that the fact that I’m typically running late and it is even more tempting to just hop in my car and crank up the heat.

But, when the will is weak sometimes fate intervenes. Last weekend I left my house to go over to a friend’s place for the evening. As it was late and extra chilly I had already resigned myself to the fact that I would drive.

When I reached my car I was surprised to find it was frozen over completely, to the point where I could not open my doors.

As my scraper was inside my car, I didn’t see any other option but to hoof it the eight blocks to my friend’s house.

The first few moments were tough to say the least. I sped quickly, going as fast as possible without slipping on the ice. I was trying to block out the cold by counting down the blocks in my head. “Only 7 more blocks to go,” I told myself.

But, once I got past the first few blocks, I felt a strange burst of energy. My cheeks stopped burning and started to glow. The cold air was coursing through my lungs and providing my body with a chill blast.

I raised my sights from the icy sidewalks and noticed how serene my surroundings were. The trees were encased in ice, with cycles hanging from branches. The only sound was my boots crunching through the snow.

Before I knew it I had arrived at my friend’s house. I walked in, was warmly welcomed, and basked in the warmth of the heated apartment.

As I wiped off my glasses, which had fogged up, I was surprised to realize I had actually enjoyed my walk. It was invigorating, and I felt completely refreshed.

We spend so much time trying to afford the extremes of nature, the heat, cold, wind, smells; we forget how much the great outdoors can do for us if we let it.

So the next time you start to walk for your car, stop and think it over. Maybe just take a walk instead.

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Our kids are going to have some fancy toys, aren’t they? Everything is downloadable this, upgrade that, or just go buy another one of those in your favorite color. We live in the digital age, and we all grew up right in the midst of it. When the ‘90s weren’t ramming a boy band down our throats, it was coming up with a new way to rob our parents blind with the newest toy fad. Here are the Top 5 Toys of Our Generation.

5. Tamagotchi/Gigapet – These keychain sized digital pets debuted in 1996 across the Pacific pond in Japan. The idea was to give people a pet on a tiny screen in an egg-shaped housing. One was required to clean up the poo, feed and “play” with their little animal (be it a dog, cat, or even a dinosaur, in some incarnations). The biggest problem came when school rolled around and you couldn’t take it with you, and in most cases you came home to a dead digi-pet. Let that heavy weight sink on your seven-year-old conscience.

4. Action figures/Barbie dolls – Action figures and Barbie dolls in the ‘90s did just about anything conceivable – even if it didn’t make any sense. Need a Batman action figure that parachutes, changes color in cold water, or shoots a missile out of a jetpack he never had? They’ve got that taken care of for you. As for Barbies, the release of “Pretty in Plaid” Barbie alongside the belly shirt and overall wearing “Cool Color Teresa” reminds us all of how AWESOME ‘90s fashion was. Just prepare to claw your eyes out with small plastic hands when you lay eyes on the neon green, fanny pack toting glory of Rollerblades Ken in short shorts.

3. Mighty Max/Polly Pocket – Get ready for some hardcore childhood gender role formation, readers. These tiny sized play sets could’ve ended the life of your infant little brother with their choke hazardtastic pieces, but you didn’t care about that. You were the godlike driving force in a micro-sized fantasy world of monsters for Mighty Max, or pink squishy things in Polly Pocket. Mighty Max play sets were monster shaped, or oriented, play sets that came with this little kid and several monsters and side characters. The kid named Max wore a baseball cap that could transport him through portals whenever it was turned backwards, therefore allowing him to have all his micro-sized adventures. Polly inhabited compact sized play worlds that involved school, dances, or adventures with her conveniently multi-cultural friends.

2. Themed Lego kits – Lego kits were perhaps this writer’s greatest vice growing up. With the sudden explosion of several different types of Lego kits, every birthday and Christmas gift for several years was accounted for. Star Wars, ancient Egypt, undersea adventures, feudal Japan and even outer space were all universes that were converted into Lego kits. Not only was the building with instructions fun, but afterwards you could tear everything apart and build a new world where Darth Maul could kick the crap out of a car driving ninja with a scuba suit if you pleased. It’s a good bet that many would-be engineers got their start with Legos.

1. Pokemon cards – If engineers got started with Legos, then today’s successful drug dealers probably got their start in that shady part of the playground with these Japanese monstrosities. Pokemon cards, short for Pocket Monsters, were the offshoot of the successful Game Boy video game series of the same name. The cards had a cute little monster with abilities listed below the picture; and people paid good money for them. After the cards made their way to the United States they quickly “evolved” into a drug-like addiction for many kids. Most schools placed bans or limits on the cards due to their disruptive nature, but the hall monitor Gestapo often didn’t extend its reach to the playground. Kids would circle around others that were carrying Charizard, Mewtwo, or at the then elusive Mew and try to haggle the little Pokemon dealer down so they could get their card fix. It’s no small wonder that some uber-religious families shielded their children from what they considered the work of Beelzebub. I say it’s more the work of Bulbasaur, but in any case Pokemon’s insanity continues to this day with 493 different species to collect and no end in sight.

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Harrison George

I am not one to shamelessly plug a company, but I have to tell you about a Web site I’ve found that is helping me change my habits in small, simple ways.

Reusablebags.com is a site for purchasing common everyday items that are environmentally friendly. The key to these items is sustainability; the ability to use them again and again.

The problem with most of the objects we use on a daily basis is that they are one time use only. Paper towels, plastic silverware, to-go boxes, water bottles, etc. These objects take massive amounts of resources to create, and then experience a very short existence from there. Most of them wind up in landfills, or worse, in our rivers and oceans.  Worst of all, due to their composition, they will take thousands of years to properly decompose.

That’s where Web sites like reusablebags.com comes in. They offer a wide range of products that do the same as their plastic counterparts, but have the ability to be used many times over. They also are made of more responsible materials, so that when they are used up they will decompose much easier.

The first product I used from this site was the reusable sandwich bags, which I received as a gift from my family. I take my lunch every day, and typically use Ziploc bags to hold my PB and Js. But with the reusable bag, basically a piece of coated plastic, I can reuse it on a daily basis. I just place the sandwich in the center of the bag and wrap it up, like a Christmas present. The best part is the inside is slick, so cleaning off the excess jelly at the end of the day is no problem.

Another great product is reusable utensils. Spoons, forks and knives are items I always wish I have around when I don’t. I hate having to resort to plastic silverware, knowing I will use it for 10 minutes and it will end up in a landfill for hundreds of years. Wood utensils offer a better solution – they can be stored in pockets, purses or book bags and work just as well. Actually, they work better. They are sturdier and wider, so they are less likely to snap in half.

The widest range of products on resubablebags revolves around shopping bags and water bottles, easily two of the biggest ways to reduce waste quickly. The EPA says the world uses between 500 billion and 1 trillion plastic bags a year. It is also estimated that Americans throw away 2.5 million plastic bottles every hour.

You know how every time you go to the store you forget to bring your reusable bag and you’re forced to use plastic instead? Well, multiply that by the 6 billion people on Earth and it’s easy to see why that above number is all too real. The same goes for plastic bottles.

While this site and others like it offer great tools to help us reduce our impact on the planet, it has to be mixed with a mindset of conservation and awareness. We have to remember to do the little things like bring our own bags to the store, to use our Nalgene bottles instead of getting a plastic one, and to walk rather than drive whenever possible. It’s tempting to think these little things don’t matter on a global level, but once they start spreading, and more people do them, they make the difference we need.

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Valentine’s Day is in a couple of days folks, and make no bones about it – people will be getting it on. The traditional tunes of the horizontal mambo are timeless: “Let’s Get It On” by Marvin Gaye, “Cant’s Get Enough of Your Love Babe” by Barry White or even “Songbird” by Kenny G. Those are all well and good, but I am sure you’d prefer to not be doing the dirty to the same song you were conceived to. For those of you looking to add a different, perhaps freakier, spice to your Valentine’s Day loving, it’s Josh’s Top 5 “Atypical Getting it on Songs.”

5. “Take a Bow” by Muse – Some may be cocking their eyebrows about now, but this song that many consider a mere song about the evils of abused political power contains one of the coolest continuous buildups in modern music. From beginning to end it’s nothing but a build of sound to one climactic moment… wait a minute. That sounds awfully familiar, doesn’t it? Give it a whirl and you may just be motivated to stick it to the man – and possibly your significant other.

4. “Closer” by Nine Inch Nails – Listening to this while having sex may make you feel like you’re supposed to be the creeper guy on an episode of “Criminal Minds.” But the raw sexual nature of the lyrics may provide the perfect fuel for some nasty leather clad fantasy fulfillment. With some dirty sounding bass, self deprecating lyrics and references to feeling people from the inside, it may be time to whip out your cuffs and safe words.

3. “Fever Dream” by Tyler Bates – Hornets, prepare for glory! This song from the “300” soundtrack can provide the necessary fuel for any man to feel like a Greek god with his lady friend. You may not be piling up the bodies of slain Persians, but you’ll insure that any female passerby knows that there by manly law you lie. Just make sure your performance doesn’t make her want to fantasize about Gerard Butler in a leather speedo.

2. “Le Disko” by Shiny Toy Guns – You ladies didn’t think I was going to forget your song did you? Turn this synth-pop tune on when you’re boy thinks he’s got it all figured out and then turn the tables on him as the song exclaims “little boys, little toys.” Give him the night he’ll never forget and leave some scratches up and down his back like the lyrics say, ‘cause every girl deserves her turn on top.

1. “The Bad Touch” by Bloodhound Gang – This song lays it all out on the table (pun intended). The song’s chorus states it best when it says, “You and me baby ain’t nothing but mammals, so let’s do it like they do on the discovery channel.” Nothing says freaky romance like a night of animalistic copulation. Lastly, with a beat that’s too legit to quit and enough innuendo to make even Prince cringe, you’ll be knocking boots for hours.

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Valentine’s Day is this Sunday, and it’s a perfect time to show your love to those special people in your life and the planet at the same time! Here are a few tips you can put into use when purchasing your Valentine’s Day gifts:

            Use fabric or cloth bags to wrap presents. Instead of using wrapping paper that’s a onetime use, and usually thrown away instead of recycled, how about using cloth to wrap your presents?  There are plenty of sites online that offer cheap fabrics that could be used time and time again to wrap presents. Failing that, use newspapers or old maps in place of wrapping paper. It’ll give it that homemade feel!

            Speaking of homemade, one of the easiest ways to help the planet, and to impress your loved ones, is to make a gift from the home. Most of the gifts we send and receive on holidays are produced and assembled in other countries and shipped here at an incredible cost. Instead of getting your gift from half-way around the world, find out what you have in your very own home. Decorate a picture frame with an important photo, write a story or a poem, or maybe a song about all the reasons you love your gift-recipient. Not only will you be cutting down on the travel of goods, you save money, too.

            Buy local. If you buy all or part of your gifts, make the purchases as local as possible. The shorter your gift has to travel to get to you, the better it is for the environment. Emporia is full of wonderful gift opportunities. Buy tickets to see a movie at The Granada, get chocolates at the Sweet Granada, or maybe a delicious meal at Amanda’s Bakery.

            Avoid diamonds at all cost. I don’t think this will be a major option for most college students, especially in this economy, but I feel the need to say it just in case. The process of mining for diamonds and other jewels is terribly painful on the planet, and creates areas that will not return to normal for hundreds of years. The work being done in mines these days in the name of diamonds is having disastrous consequences around the world. If you want to buy some jewelry, find a more eco-conscious jewel that can be purchased.

            Give gifts they need, not just want. Real love is knowing what a person needs, not just what they want. There are plenty of things out there that we would all like to have, but don’t want to spend the money on. Make this holiday the time to splurge for that someone. Get them a nice reusable mug or thermos to hold their drinks and cut down on use of plastic bottles. Buy them some reusable shopping bags, rechargeable batteries, gift cards to a natural food store, or some eco-friendly bathroom products like shampoo or bath salts.

            If you really want to do your part, talk to your partner about donating money to a good cause. Instead of spending money on each other, pick a good environmental charity and donate the money you would have spent on that. Greenpeace, Humane Society and the World Wildlife Fund are all great places to start.

            No matter what you do, just keep in mind that this holiday is all about love – not just for our friends and family, but for our planet too. Let’s make it a holiday of red and green.

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Chicken Salad Wraps

Prep Time: 10 Min

Ready In: 10 Min

Servings: Original Recipe: 6 servings

Ingredients

2 (10 ounce) cans chunk chicken, chopped and drained

1/4 cup chopped onion

1/4 cup mayonnaise

4 tablespoons fresh salsa

salt and pepper to taste

6 (10 inch) flour tortillas

lettuce

Directions:

In a small bowl combine the chicken, onion, mayonnaise, salsa, salt and pepper. Mix together.

Line each tortilla with two lettuce leaves, then divide chicken salad mixture evenly among each tortilla and roll up, or “wrap.”

Nutritional Information

Amount Per Serving 

Calories: 464 | Total Fat: 14.8g | Cholesterol: 61mg

***EDITOR’S NOTE: In the last issue of The Bulletin, the directions for Dourmet stated to cover meat with foil before placing it in the microwave. Foil should not be placed in a microwave. The Bulletin regrets the error.

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