“Are oral and anal sex okay in God’s perspective?” a curious student asked anonymously last Thursday at the second of a triad of dating, sex and love discussions sponsored by Christian Challenge.
The forum featured Christian rock music, a brief history lecture on God’s plan for sex as depicted in the bible and an open discussion where participants could ask questions verbally or anonymously about sex. Anonymous questions were submitted in a jar at the beginning of the meeting. Questions spanned topics from “what’s acceptable in a dating relationship?” to “is it okay to have sex if we plan to get married?”
“I try to talk about sex and relationships every year at least once because I feel like there are lots of opportunities for students to hear other perspectives,” said Jason Huebner, director of Christian Challenge. “If you want to know what your roommate thinks about sex or relationships, your roommate’s right there. I think if a student wants to know the Bible’s perspective on sex or what God would say about it or how relationships are supposed to work from a Christian perspective, there’s not a lot of opportunity to ask hard questions or to be really honest about that stuff.”
Huebner’s goal was to create an atmosphere where students could comfortably ask questions and voice their concerns about sex while soliciting answers from a biblical viewpoint.
“I think a lot of these questions, students are asking each other, are asking someone or they’re asking themselves,” Huebner said. “I would be surprised if they asked these same questions in church, or with a stranger, or with a lot of people, but we try to make people as comfortable as they can be, to be honest and to be real and that’s why I try to be as straight forward as possible about what I think is right or what I think the bible says.”
By informing college-aged Christians of their responsibilities regarding sex in God’s perspective, Huebner hopes to give them the “tools to be able to make more mature decisions,” despite their changing environment.
“I think we would be naive if we assumed that college students go from the shelter of living with their parents to the freedom of college, and with that complete freedom always make wise choices, regardless of whether a person is a Christian or whatever their world view or belief system,” Huebner said.
He says the issue of premarital sex is not one defined socially, but rather biblically.
“The Bible doesn’t say (premarital sex) is a problem, but the bible’s language is that it is a sin, and that just means that it’s something that goes against what God desires,” Huebner said. “I would say that’s a problem no matter who you are or what your age. If you are making decisions with your life that go against what God desires, I think you need to know about that.”
As relating to the college campus, Huebner said sex is a concern of many individuals.
“It’s not a problem on the same level that starvation or war are problems, but it’s not a good thing,” he said. “If it wasn’t an issue, the university wouldn’t bring speakers in to talk about sex and college students wouldn’t get pregnant or contract STDs or end up emotionally broken by relationships that fall apart and sexual relationships that end in a bad breakup.”
He acknowledges that the discussion is not appropriate for all settings, but instead focused on those who are likely to share his viewpoints because of a common belief system.
“My guidance from the Bible isn’t for everyone on campus,” Huebner said. “I wouldn’t go visit the fraternity or the sorority or a gathering of students on campus and say, ‘none of you should have sex until you’re married because I said it’s right.’ All I can say is that if you are pursuing a relationship with Jesus, then he has something to say to you about sex: that sex should be in the context of marriage and that’s the only context where it’s right. In that context it’s great, it’s beautiful, it’s how he designed it and it connects a husband and a wife together. That’s how it’s supposed to work.”
Katrina Kinnan, senior secondary education social studies and art major, complimented the discussion for addressing a topic that she feels Christians often avoid.
“It’s good for people to be able to hear that perspective and be able to ask questions if they need to,” Kinnan said, “because I know that it’s kind of true that if people come to Christian things like this, they may come from a Christian background where maybe they got a perspective that they shouldn’t talk about it or should avoid it or something like that and I think it’s good to talk about and discuss it.”
Daniel Buller, graduate student in history, felt the forum presented a fresh view on a familiar topic, and in doing so clarified misunderstandings about the Christian perspective of sex.
“I think there are misconceptions out there about what the Christian view is on a lot of this stuff,” Buller said. “I think it’s good that Jason addresses it and he does it from a biblical perspective. I’ve benefited from it. Hearing about it more kind of makes you think about it more. You can always learn something new even if you feel like you agree with it.”
Kinnan said the topic of the discussion is important because it can relate to everyone.
“Sex seems to be part of our culture and part of the way we are,” Kinnan said. “I’d be shocked if somebody never has to deal with it.”
The next discussion will focus on love tonight at 7 p.m. in Visser Hall 330.
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